Constantly Battling FAT

I have spent my entire life as the FAT person in the room.  I remember weighing 172 pounds when I was 12 years old (the lightest weight I can ever remember weighing).
By the time I was 17, I was up to 225 pounds. That was the first time I truly dieted.  I lost 50 pounds in six months, graduated from high school, wore my beautiful prom dress, and immediately jumped off the bandwagon.
It wasn't until I was 23 that I finally faced the fact I had gained SEVENTY pounds since high school. In October 2010, I weighed in at 245.5 pounds! I was disgusted with myself. I immediately went on a diet, started working out 5-6 times a week and by June 2011, I was down to 184 pounds (a 61.5 pound loss!!)
I maintained my new weight for a few months, but life happens and slowly, pound by pound, I was back up to 225 by the time I got pregnant in June 2014.
The day I gave birth I weighed 269 pounds. Within two weeks, I was back down to 225.... and a few months the weight was creeping back on.

One of my biggest problems is that I eat out of boredom. And being home on maternity leave, I had more free time than ever before. I had bacon, eggs, and toast for breakfast 4 or 5 days a week. I'd eat chicken fingers and fries for lunch or make homemade pizzas on english muffins.  I had so much free time and could plan to make my favourite foods while the baby napped.

My other huge problem is that I eat when I'm stressed.  A true food addict at heart, I can feel my stress diminishing when I am eating something super sugar and carb loaded.

 In May 2016, I suffered from a herniated disc. I know the reason why my disc herniated is because I have so much excess weight on my body and I live a sedentary lifestyle.  I decided to change that then and there and focused on losing weight without making many changes.  I lost forty pounds in the next seven months but when Christmas came and left I had gained eight pounds and couldn't lose any of it.

Last week, there was a health scare in my family.  Someone near and dear to me has been having heart problems and while there is no diagnosis yet, the doctors believe it is Angina. This health scare has really set me straight.  This isn't about losing weight.  This is my HEALTH.  This is my LIFE.  I have a CHILD that I need to live for, be healthy for, run around with.

So... I start again. Back at step one, ready to make changes. My ultimate goal is to lose 100 pounds total by my Champagne Birthday, I am turning 30 at the end of August and I have already lost 35 pounds so have 65 left to go.
So... here I go!!! Making my best effort possible. Knowing if I treat myself once it doesn't mean the entire day is a free for all.

"Why do you never write about THIS on your blog??"

Last week, I looked forward to Saturday all week. I had the night off, my mom and dad were going out, Sean was going away for the night, and Scott is never around. I was going to stay home, eat tons of fattening food, and watch movies.

But, my best friend (Kyla) was free and so was I so we decided to go out.

We hit up Jack Astor's and got pan bread with cheese and I order chicken parmigiana. It was bowtie pasta in a cream sauce with a deep fried chicken breast with tomato sauce and cheese on top. YUM. As I was shoving everything into my face, Kyla said to me, "Why do you never write about THIS on your blog??"

Here's the truth, guys.

I plan my fat days about a week in advance. And all week I eat really well, really healthy. I work out 5 days a week at least. And so I really look forward to my one fat day a week. And when I have it, I probably go a little more insane than I should. Saturday was a good example of that. Following my pan bread, chicken, and pasta, I then got popcorn, ate some chocolate covered pretzels, and had sour candy!!!!

This weekend's bad eating made me realize its time for me to pull in the reigns and crack down on my poor eating habits... even on my fat days. I went way overboard and I've paid for it. Now, it will take me all week to get back to where I was (weight-wise). And, today I'm cranky and bloated. I'm also really stressed. I find that exercising and eating healthy helps to keep my stress level down and my happy level up.

So, today I'm back on 100%. No more cheating, no more going off. I will still have my fat days.... but it probably won't include QUITE as much as Saturday night did. Having a fat day doesn't have to mean over doing it. It can just mean enjoying what little bit of extra fat I enjoy.

I also kind of feel ashamed admitting this to all of you guys!!! I've heard from a lot of people since I started dieting how much of an "inspiration" I am (which feels great!!). But when I act without regard, I just feel like I'm letting everyone down. So, I'm asking you, my friends.... if you see me eating poorly, or talking about it... STOP ME!!! I bought a size 12 dress for sean and alicha's wedding and I'm a 14 now!! I need to lose enough weight in the next 4 and a half weeks to fit into this dress, eeek!!!

And if you need encouragement, send me a message and I'll be that person for you! Sometimes knowing you're going to have a friend asking you about your diet or working out is all the motivation you need!!

Love you all :)

FIFTY pounds!!

I've been a little out of touch with my blog lately, allow me to explain.

A string of busy-ness and bad luck has kept me from going to the gym. A few weeks ago I was really busy with Alicha spending a couple days on shower stuff, wedding stuff, and a shower that the church had for her. Then I had t

hree interviews in one day... and then I suffered a major back injury that left my almost unable to stand up/sit down!! I'm still not 100% sure what happened, I did massage therapy 2 times in one week and saw the chiropractor 3 times in that one week, too. Whatever it was, it was terrible and I've been referred for an x-ray. By the time my back pain was subsiding, I had not been to the gym in NINE days!!!

As soon as my back pain started to subside, I got sick with a cold. That set me back a

nother THREE.

Glenna got me back into the swing of things with a 5 k walk/jog around her neighbourhood and then I hit up the gym after. I was back on track and heading to the gym every day, and then got sick again, but this time with strep throat!! Even while I'm sick I stay on track with my diet and continue to eat healthy.

I made it to my first weight goal of 200 pounds on April 14!! I had lost 45.5 pounds to obtain this goal!!! I've been

working hard and kicking butt since December 1st and it's certainly showing.

Then today I got weighed and I was 194.6!!!! I have lost 50.9 pounds!!! ... I'm just saying 50!!! I am so incredibly proud of myself.

I try to encourage the people around me as much as I can because I know the huge difference eating healthy and exercising has made in my life. I'm happier and full of life and I'm looking pretty great (if I do say so myself). I can't remember the last time I was in the 100's.... when I met Mathew almost 4 years ago I weighed 220 pounds.... This weight has been on for awhile and it's not easy to take off, but it's so worth it. My mom has been on Weight Watchers and I've been packing her lunches and making her breakfasts. But tonight my mom, my dad, and I decided to go back to the 1980's weight watchers menu plans. Mom, Dad, and I did these when I was in grade 12 and I lo

st 50 pounds, my dad lost 70, and my mom last 40. The problem was... we didn't do maintenance once we lost our weight. We lost and then ate what we wanted to again. We gained back everything we'd lost PLUS some... which is what "they" say happens.

When I lost weight in grade 12 I was down to 175. My goal is to be 16

5 by the end of August. The last time I was in the 160's... I was in grade seven. It's so sad.

But THIS. This is HAPPY. Here are my before and after measurements:

Right Upper Arm- WAS: 16" NOW: 13"

Waist- WAS: 47" NOW: 35"

Hips- WAS: 54" NOW: 44"

Right Thigh- WAS: 29" NOW: 25"

I'm SO amazed that I've lost OVER A FOOT from my hips and a FOOT from my waist. WOW.

I've shed 33 inches of FAT over those four spots! I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!

I took a few pics of me (in my work out clothes) the other day because when I first started dieting I didn't have very high expectations of myself or my ability to stay on track... so I never took any pics. I'm going to post a few casual before pics and a few pics of me (in work out gear) now.

just wanted to share a pic!!

wanted to share a before and after pic with you guys.... the first pic was taken last september when I was 240ish (not quite up to my 245.5 mark yet). the pic on the right is me tonight... at 200lbs!!! 45.5 pounds lost... and the difference in the pics?!!? it's all been so worth it! thanks to all my friends and family that have been sooo encouraging :)

The excuses we make NOT to diet

Since I've started dieting, I've heard every excuse (I've used) in the book. Heck, I still use some of those excuses today!!! Below, I will share with you the different excuses that I've used and heard, and my rebuttals to them. If you've heard any others, share them with me!!!

1. "It's so expensive to buy healthy food".
This is the most common. Who reading this hasn't said it? Hasn't heard it?! I disagree completely. Before I started my new lifestyle, I would spend around $150-175 every two weeks on groceries. I'm now spending about $125-150 every two weeks. It's not a significant difference, but it's certainly not more expensive!!! I find the most expensive thing to buy is meat, but if I wasn't dieting I'd be eating meat anyways. Vegetables and fruit can be a bit more expensive, but if you buy what's on sale that week, you'll find that they won't run you anymore than the bag of chips you're buying would, or the bag of cookies, or the juice. Once I started my new lifestyle I've almost entirely given up my diet pepsi addiction. Giving up the beverages that you buy will cut a shocking amount off your grocery bill!!! Mathew and I would usually buy 2-3 bottles of juice every two weeks and 3-4 bottles of diet pepsi. That ended up costing us about $15 every two weeks!!!

I think the most important trick with buying groceries is to listen to the thing you hear so often from dietitians and people that are savvy with buying groceries and saving money; STICK TO THE OUTSIDE AISLES. The only aisles I go down in the grocery store now are to get pasta, rice, oatmeal, and cereal. If I'm making chili and spaghetti then canned food, but other than that I only use the outside aisles. It also keeps you from eating over processed food!!

2. "I can't afford a gym membership".
If I hear this one more time, I may just scream!!!! Can you afford to buy a coffee every day? Do you go to the movies every a month? Do you go out to eat every month? My gym membership is $46 dollars a month. Not only does it give me a way to get fit, sexy, and hot, it also gives me a form of entertainment! There are tons of classes. Already at my new gym (I've only gone twice) I've met two people! It's a great way to get involved in your community, meet some people, and get healthy. Also, your heart needs to exercise!!! AND if you can't afford a gym membership, well, you have two feet and a heartbeat, get your butt in gear and go for a walk around your neighbourhood. Exercise at home! I downloaded exercise videos to my computer for FREE, so I'm sure you can do that, too!!

3. "I don't have time".

The one thing the gym has given me is MORE TIME!!! I sleep less now than I ever have before. I sleep about 6-7 hours a night and sleeping in for me is sleeping more than eight hours. Exercising has given me so much energy... and getting all those processed junky foods out of me is allowing my body to work its best.

4. "I won't know what to eat"

The most important thing is vegetables and fruit. Make sure you get the servings you need every day! I try to eat a fruit with breakfast, at least two veggie servings and a fruit at lunch, and at least two veggie servings and fruit with supper. And then I eat all the regular foods I would usually eat, but I measure out my portions and I buy low fat/low cal options. My new favourite food is vegan margarine!! It's soo yummy!! And LEAN meats. Turkey and chicken are your best options. I eat red meat as a treat, and I stay way from pork. Also, try to get fiber into you! AND if you STILL don't know what to eat... then you really are using this as an EXCUSE.

Excuses are what we use so that we don't have to hold ourselves accountable. I've realized that now. Before I just thought my excuses were legitimate reasons. Now, I see my excuses let me eat as much as I want, never concerned about the fat or calories!! And when I tried dieting I'd blame it on other things... like, I was too busy, or I had a birthday that week and was going to be eating out, or Mathew was in town and we wanted to go on a date. BELIEVE ME, I still eat fattening food!!! I love to treat myself and eat french fries... or poutine... or chinese food... or anything really. I love treats! But what used to be my meals every day have now become my treats.

And I have some exciting news, too. When I got weighed this morning I was 200.8 pounds! I am .8 pounds away from meeting my first goal of reaching 200 pounds! It was 45.5 pounds I was aiming to lose, and I'm very, very proud of myself for almost getting there. It's been a LOT of hard work and determination, but it's been worth it!!!

After this goal is met, my next one is 165! and according to Loseit.com I'll be there by August 18th! YAY!

Have a wonderful day, readers!

What do you eat??

I get asked this question constantly. As soon as people hear I'm on a diet, they want to know two things. 1) What do I eat? 2) Do I work out?

At first, I found planning my diet to be incredibly hard. No matter what I tried, I seemed to be eating too much. And not enough.
I originally started (in January) by following the Canada food guide. 7-8 serving of vegetables and fruits, 6-7 grain products, 2 meats and alternatives, and 2 milk and alternatives. It was easy to create my own diet with so little guidelines!!
In February, when I started using loseit.com, my diet followed almost the exact same pattern every day. For breakfast I have a fruit, a grain, and a dairy. And I usually try to get some protein in (especially if I'm going to be heading to the gym!). Breakfast is usually:

• Boiled egg, one piece of toast, and a fruit
• 1/2 cup Oatmeal, 1/2 cup skim milk, and 1 tbsp pumpkin seeds and 1 tbsp dried cranberries
• 1 cup cereal, 1 cup milk, and fruit
• Vegetable omelette with egg whites and 2 tbsp low fat cheese with a piece of toast.

I rotate between these 4 breakfasts every day and never get bored!! Most of these breakfasts are around 350-400 calories. I try to always keep my breakfast under 400 calories.
The most important thing I do is measure my food. I cannot place enough importance on this. Measuring holds me accountable to portion sizes. Before I started dieting I used food as a coping mechanism for my stress/anger/sadness. Measuring my food gives me more control than my food.

Lunch is probably my most varied meal of the day. Lunch can be leftovers from the night before, or I make lunch. Lunch is something like:

• 1/2 can tuna with 1 tbsp low fat mayo, one piece of bread, salad, 1 tbsp salad dressing, cucumber, and a fruit.
• Salad with 1 tbsp dressing, half a chicken breast, a tomato, and a fruit.
• A wrap (low fat wrap with vegetables and cheese) fruit, and a salad

I try to keep my lunch around 400-500 calories. Lunch is the meal I cheat the most on! I don't know why, maybe its cause it's in the middle of the day. Yesterday, for example. I packed a lunch and took it to work. Tuna and bread, cucumber, almonds, and pineapple. And yogurt. And instead of eating my packed lunch, I ate pizza. Why would I do that? I think I cheat then because its when I figure it's easiest to burn off the calories over the rest of the day than it is at supper time.

Supper is my favourite meal of the day. Anyone that knows me knows I love stir fry. Especially chicken stir fry. For supper, I'll make:

• Chicken stir fry; half a chicken breast and 2 cups of different vegetables, soya sauce, 1/2 cup rice, low cal pudding and fruit (dessert!!)
• Spaghetti sauce (1/2 cup) and 1 cup spaghetti, salad, 1 tbsp dressing, and yogurt.
• 1 cup chili on a bed of salad (especially on days when I overate carbs ALL day)
• Grilled chicken, 1 boiled potato, steamed vegetables, fruit salad

And so on. Supper is usually around 400-500 calories. I never have a hard time creating suppers and I don't worry about throwing weird stuff together. I always make chili and spaghetti sauce ahead because I eat it so frequently its worth my while. I make double recipes and freeze them in small containers that have just the right amount for me (and Mathew).

Snacks through my day are:

• 15 almonds and a fruit (especially if I'm heading to the gym, I'll eat almonds an hour before)
• Fruit smoothies (a combination of milk/yogurt/juice/real fruit, both fresh and frozen)
• Crackers and low fat cheese
• Popcorn (I love fresh popped popcorn!!!! and low fat bags of popcorn)
• ANY vegetables
• ANY fruit

I never the limit the amount of fruit or veggies I'll eat. If I'm over my 1400 calories for the day, I'll eat more fruit and vegetables if I'm still hungry. Not only are they healthy and low cal, but they are so good for you.

When I started my diet I remember reading somewhere... "does your food weigh you down?" and I thought "YES!!" Some weekend mornings, there's nothing more that I enjoy that McDonald's breakfast. I would go get my McGriddle and my two hashbrowns and love them.... and then need to take a nap after eating them. My food WAS weighing me down. Now my food gives me energy.

Since I started my healthy lifestyle, my body has adapted in many ways but the number one way... the amount of sleep I need. Before I would sleep about ten hours a night and still feel like I hadn't had enough. I now sleep about 7 hours a night. In fact, right now I'm awake (and its only 5:51) because I went to bed early last night (around 9) and my body just won't let me sleep anymore! Its times like this I take the sign, grab my running shoes, and head to the gym.

Healthy eating is easy. I hear excuses all the time about why people can't diet. I MADE those same excuses, too. It all has to come with a personal choice. Once YOU decide you're ready to make the changes that you have to to become the new you, it's easy to go from there. We're all in this together. Find yourself a support group of friends that are dieting, too, to hold you accountable. You'll find the further away from January you get, the more those friends will fall off the bandwagon.... but YOU don't have to! YOU can be the person that inspires your friends! All you have to do is make the choice. You want to be healthy! Your body is designed to work most optimally when you are healthy, when your heart is in good shape and you are in good shape and you're getting the right nutrients.

:) Thats my pep talk for the day! I'm off to the gym now!

Some insight from the lovely Jillian Michaels!!!

Q: Why does my online workout program consist of just one day of pure cardio and four days of weight training? Although I love weight training, I've always thought it's the cardio that really helps a woman like me lose the weight. Why so little pure cardio?

ASK JILLIAN: Okay — I love dispelling this myth. Resistance training when done in circuits with cardio intervals is the best way to lose weight for the following reasons:

1. Resistance training will help burn intramuscular fat and create lean muscle tissue, but you can’t build muscle mass unless you are lifting extremely heavy weights and eating more calories than you are burning in a day. Additionally, it is VERY difficult for a woman to gain muscle mass because we simply don’t have the testosterone needed to build muscle tissue the way men do.

2. Resistance circuit training burns more calories than straight cardio both during the workout and after. This is because you are getting the benefits of a resistance-training workout and a cardio workout all in one. Additionally, you will burn more calories for up to 24 hours after weight lifting than you would with cardio alone because your body has to work hard to return your muscles to a pre-lactate state (the state before training).

Here is what cardio is good for: weight-loss extra credit. In other words, you can only train your muscles so many times in a week without overtraining them, which is counterproductive. Your muscles need adequate rest and recovery time for best results, but you can do as much cardio as you want. I mean, you can’t run a marathon every day, but you can jog, bike, use the elliptical machine, or swim pretty much as often as you want.